Jerry's Party Saved Me

Grayson and I decided that we had to go to Jerry's party. After all the complaining I have done about how unfriendly the Czech people are, there was no way I was going to pass up an invitation from my one and only Czech friend. Tim, Sue and Laura had gone to the National Theater to see the ballet and Dave was under the weather, so Grayson and I were on our own. We did our best to dress like rock-stars, but had VERY limited resources-I think we did OK. We took the tram to Jerry's apartment and found it pretty easily. The party was in full swing when we got there-it is a bit nerve-wracking showing up to a party full of strangers when you don't know if you'll be able to communicate with them-but everyone was friendly! There were people from Prague (in addition to the international friends) and everyone spoke English! Grayson and I held one girl hostage while we fired 3 months worth of questions at her. We talked to her for close to an hour-she probably hates Americans now. We danced and partied until far too late, meeting all kinds of exciting characters and hearing all manner of juicy stories. When it was time to go, we were standing on the street corner trying to figure out which tram to take and where the nearest tram stop was located. (Trams run constantly, but after midnight they are few and far between.) A car pulls up to us and rolls down the window-it was the girl we had just ridden with in the elevator and she was offering us a ride! These people aren't evil! We told her where we were staying and she said that it was no problem, on her way home. At 3 a.m., she seemed like the most generous person I had ever met. The drive was 10 minutes-it would have taken us an hour or more on the tram (if we didn't get lost). This was the first time we had been in a car in Prague and it felt luxurious. We thanked her so many times that she probably thought we were deranged.

The unfortunate part of our adventure was that we didn't get to meet any of these people until a week before we were due to leave. However, it was really fortunate that I did get to meet them because it gave me some new ideas about the Czech people. It is still my opinion that they are not a friendly group, and are not generally receptive to strangers. But it seems that once you have met someone who will vouch for you, they introduce you to all of their friends and welcome you with open arms. Basically they are really clique-y. If you've ever been a newcomer to Raleigh, (or maybe any new city), then you probably know what I'm talking about. The difference is that people in the south are outwardly friendly, but it can take a long time for them to accept you in to their "inner circle". Either way, it makes "making friends" challenging. Generally, I feel relieved to have come away with a positive experience-I was worried that I was going to harbor feelings of hatred for all of eternity, swearing never to set foot in the Czech Republic again. Thanks for saving me, Jerry.

Fun or Misery

My parents and sister left yesterday after having been here for a week. We did plenty of sightseeing and extraordinary amounts of eating. And of course we did another segway tour! (Not that I really gave anyone the option.) Our group consisted of Tim and Sue (parents), Laura (sister), Dave (husband), Grayson (classmate and friend), and myself. I had specifically asked for Jerry (our previous tour guide) because he was so friendly and full of great information. I think he was scheduled to have the weekend off, but agreed to meet us at 11:00 a.m. on Saturday. We got there and each person went through a trial run without any problems. However, Tim was going very slowly and wouldn't bend his arms and legs which made him look like a very tall robot. Regardless, we were ready for our tour. Before long, everyone was comfortable and we were zipping around Prague like pros. The segways are only allowed to go 10 kph in the city (their max speed is 20 kph) which isn't really fast enough once you get used to it (according to Tim, 10 kph is too fast). We stopped for beverages and fellowship for a bit, and I learned some interesting tidbits about my new friend Jerry:

1. He OWNS the segway tours place with two business partners (he's probably in his late 20's or early 30's) and the business is doing well.

2. He has a degree in Art History from the Sorbonne.

3. He plays the organ and organizes organ concerts in the community.

4. We heard him speak at least 4 languages.

5. He has written and published articles about art history.

All of this came up during our beverage break (because we grilled him-not because he was bragging).

So we were off on the rest of our journey. At one point we were zipping along and I realized that Tim and Sue were no longer behind us. We turned back and saw them at the other end of the, street-they had completely missed the turn and were on their way to being lost forever. Shortly after that, Dave was dismounted from his vehicle while trying to navigate through a tight construction area. He tried to hold on to the segway, but they are designed to right themselves. So when he went down, the segway jerked out of his hands and was standing up straight while Dave was sprawled on the ground-limbs akimbo. He wasn't hurt and it was hilarious.

I talked to Jerry while we traversed and he told me that he was having a party at his house later that night. Since his friends are spread throughout Europe, they choose one person's house to meet for a party once a year. There is a dress-up theme and drink theme-this year was 'rock-star' and gin and tonics. He invited us and gave me his number.

At this point we finished our tour with most of our egos in tact. Everyone had a great time, but Tim says that 'fun' is just too stressful for him to handle on a regular basis.

Segway-Where have you been all my life?

Jen and her parents came to visit this last week and it was SOOOO nice to see friends from home. We did lots of eating and sightseeing, but the best thing we did was the segway tour. Unfortunately we couldn't do it until after Mary Jane and Michael had gone back to Raleigh, so it was just Jen and me (plus 4 other strangers). First, our instructor, Jerry, had each of us do a trial run, one at a time. Everyone did great, no trouble. When it was my turn, I wobbled out of control, ran up the curb and fell off. Perfect. At that point I saw a sign for mojitos and was thinking that perhaps my afternoon would be better (and safer) spent on the restaurant porch with a cocktail. (Of course Jen got a video of me wrecking-it's probably on her facebook page.) Also, if you don't want to be the center of attention, a segway is not your best option. You look completely nerdy zipping around standing up wearing a helmet. That being said, segwaying is FANTASTIC! Jen and I have decided to go on segway tours in every city that has them. We had a 2 1/2 hr. tour where Jerry took us to see things we wouldn't have found on our own and gave us stories that may not be in the history books. Example: There is an old church that no longer has services. The reason: Years ago, the priest was an alcoholic and started selling the organ pipes one by one to pay for his cocktails. The organ no longer works. Jerry told us all kinds of juicy tidbits about Prague-I should have done the tour my first week here. The tour cost $75.00 which seemed steep initially, but I would pay it again in a minute-it was more than worth it. I can't wait to do the one in Raleigh-let me know if you want to join our segway team!

Istanbul-Final Chapter

When we weren't buying rugs and steaming ourselves in the hamam, we were walking. And walking and walking. We also took the ferry on two occasions- one to an island with castle ruins and the other to a small summer vacation island, both with more delicious food and tea, of course. We saw castles, mosques, churches and a beautiful underground cistern. All of these places were amazing, as you would imagine, but the three things that I keep thinking about were not nearly so grand: water, plumbing and strays. First, the water-you can't drink it-everyone drinks only bottled water. You can shower and wash clothes, but that's it. By the end of the week, I was really appreciating the water in the US, where we never have to worry about dysentery or weather we have enough bottled water to brush our teeth before bed (which is when you realize that you forgot to buy more). One morning, without thinking, I drank two cups from the faucet in the bathroom. As soon as I realized it, I panicked, but eventually realized that there wasn't alot I could do to change the situation, so I waited. Miraculously, nothing happened, but I was much more vigilant after that. Next, plumbing. Holy smokes. Every trip to the bathroom was a new adventure. You can't put ANYTHING in any toilet anywhere, ever-not even toilet paper. And it's not like you might want to sneak and do it because that may lead to having a very awkward conversation with someone who doesn't speak English about why you have not followed the rules and just destroyed their bathroom. Definitely not worth the risk. Now just think for a moment about putting all of the things you flush down the toilet into the garbage instead......not pretty or fragrant. However, there is an upside (can you believe it?). In the back of the toilet bowl near the top is a water-squirter that keeps you from having to use quite so much toilet paper. It's sort of like a toilet and a bidet in one, but the water is ice-cold. It will nearly make you jump right off the toilet if you aren't ready. Dave was so enamored that I think we may be getting all new toilets when we return to Raleigh.

Istanbul also has another kind of toilet (mostly older public toilets) which is a basin in the floor with a drain, no water. You squat over the basin (hopefully you remembered you're own toilet paper) and when you're done you fill a small plastic pitcher with water from a spigot to pour down the drain. This type of toilet really helps to improve balance, hand-eye co-ordination, fine motor skills and multi-tasking. All in all, making you a better person when you are finished.

Finally, strays. There are dogs and cats everywhere (alot more cats than dogs). Initially I was really concerned, so I asked the rug man and got an interesting answer. Instead of euthanizing healthy strays, in Istanbul they tag/microchip the dogs and let them go. (I don't think they do the cats.) All of the dogs looked healthy and none of them were aggressive. People seem to adopt them, almost as a neighborhood pet, looking after them and feeding them. They spend most of their days laying in the sun. All of the cats looked healthy, too. Not old, skinny or sick. If I understood correctly, they wait until they are sick to euthanize. I think they also spay/neuter the animals. The reason for this is that in the Muslim religion you are not supposed to hurt any living thing, even bugs. So basically the community takes care of the animals. It's a very different solution to the problem of strays.

Istanbul-Chapter 3

One of my favorite things that we did in Istanbul was going to the hamam, which is the Turkish bath. (For those of you that I have told about the Korean "Spa World" in D.C., this is similar.) First let me give you some background info. Turkey is 50% Muslim and part of the Muslim religion focuses on cleanliness-of person, mind, work, home, etc. So before the days of indoor plumbing, Muslims went to the hamam to get clean before going to the mosque. (Sidenote-there are washing areas outside of the mosques where Muslims sit to wash their hands, feet, and face before entering.

It was COLD outside and they were washing away. I'm guessing that it was cold water because barely any places in Turkey had warm water. I immediately thought that I would be far too much of a sissy to be Muslim.)

The hamam is a building that is at least 1000 years old. You walk in to a reception area, pay your money and they take you to a private changing room where you leave your items locked up. The women change in to a triangle bikini top (ill-fitting, zero coverage) and essentially boxer shorts made of madras. The guys get a large rectangle of madras to wrap around their waist. (Traditional hamams kept the men and women separate, but now some of them are co-ed because so many non-Muslims like to go.)

Once you've got on your madras and horrible wooden flip-flops that are a danger to yourself and others, you head in to the steam room, which is incredible. The entire room is light grey/

white stone. There is a giant circular altar that is about 15'-20' across and 3 1/2 ' high where everyone is laying and sweating. There are low sinks with hot and cold water and bowls so that you can pour water on yourself to adjust your temperature. One of the most interesting things is that there are gutters built into the stone floors so that all of the water is draining away from the room. The entire thing is an engineering miracle for being so old. Once you have become weary from the heat, the massage boys come in and direct you to a small open room with two stone slabs (still part of the steam room) where you receive a vigorous scrub and massage. They take exfoliation to a whole new level and cover you in a blanket of lovely smelling warm suds. When you've had your fill, you head to the drying room where they wrap you in towels (including your head-like the Queen of Sheba) and lead you to the resting room where you can enjoy beverages until you are ready to get changed and leave.

People! Why do so many countries have steam-room activity centers and not us (and the steam room at the YMCA doesn't count)! This place and the place in D.C.(which is Korean, not American) are like family/community gathering areas where everyone goes to hang out and relax. We need more of these-Americans are an uptight group of people, (self most definitely included) who would definitely benefit from these activities.

The uptightness (not a real word) of Americans was obvious when we saw another American couple, about our age, in the steam room. There were plenty of other people in the room who were enjoying themselves (including grandmas whose bikini tops were under alot of strain). But when this couple came in, they weren't quite sure what to do. Dave gave them some pointers (as you know, he loves to talk to strangers) and the guy seemed to jump right in. However, the female sat ram-rod straight with her towel wrapped tight and a scowl on her face. 30-45 minutes later she had not moved. She hadn't even loosened her towel and it was HOT! She had on the same outfit as the rest of us, so I can't imagine what the problem was. It must be fun being married to her.

So if I haven't told you about Spa World, google it. It's in Virginia just outside of D.C. and it is one of the most amazing places that I have been. You pay $30 and get to stay up to 24 hrs. It is a mecca of relaxation-go there if you are ever in the area.

Istanbul-Chapter 2 Cont.

Another driver takes us to the family restaurant, which is really nice. This family obviously knows a thing or two about business. They are staying open late for us and we are the only people there. The rug man orders INSANE amounts of food and alcohol for the three of us. They bring out the fish selection, (which is 10-20 whole fish) and ask us to choose which we would like and how we would like it prepared. We decide on a fish and the rug man suggests a method of preparation where they pack the fish in salt, bake it, bring it to the table, light it on fire and chip away the salt with a small hammer. It was incredible. This was after we had eaten the largest prawns I had ever seen, anchovy salad, vegetable salads, small fried fish, bread and probably alot more stuff that I don't remember. The rug man had been talking non-stop about himself and all of the money he makes in his business dealings (questionable), but had started to yawn and was visibly tired. But we MUST have desert and then he can take us to the disco! This man is a maniac! We already bought the rug! What more do you want from us-it's 1:00 a.m.! We opted not to go to the disco and took a cab back to the hotel. Buying a rug took us about 10 hrs.

We realized that this was just their mode of doing business-they take tourists around town and sell them rugs. But here's the interesting thing: we ran into the carpet man two more times and both times he invited us to do an activity. We ran into him on his way to the gym, and he invited us to come along. We ran into him near the store, and we HAD to go in and have some tea. These people are nothing if not hospitable-I loved Turkey. The Czech Republic could learn a thing or two from their Turkish neighbors.

Istanbul-Chapter 2

Our first full day in Istanbul started like this: Dave woke up early and went to investigate the city while I slept late (the only REAL way to start a vacation). He was walking around the park and met a Turkish man about our age, named Sabri. They started talking and Sabri told Dave that his family owned a rug store just around the corner. (I know, it sounds like the beginning of an international murder-mystery movie. Dave does not believe that you are not supposed to talk to strangers.) So Dave went with Sabri to the rug store and of course they had tea. Sabri wanted to tell Dave about the rugs, but Dave said that they should wait because I would want to hear about them too. Dave comes back to the hotel, we eat lunch and go back to the rug store to talk about rugs, or so we think. First, of course, we must have tea and conversation. The rug store is a huge operation and really nice-not a basement in a back alley. Sabri wants to know how we like Istanbul, what we've done so far (not much yet), and what are some of the things we want to do while we're there. He also has some suggestions of things we might enjoy that aren't quite so touristy. He says he'd love to show us a few of his favorite places. He has time right now, if we're not busy. Don't worry, we'll talk about rugs later and we shouldn't feel obligated to buy one. He's going to call the store driver and set it up.

Time out. Everything about who I am says RED FLAG. This man is way too nice. We don't know anything about him and he's ready to drop everything to take us sightseeing? Shouldn't he be working? We are definitely going to be kidnapped and sold into prostitution. However, I actually think that I might be over-reacting. This is a REALLY nice store with plenty of customers. Everyone speaks English. Nothing sketchy has happened-not even close. You can't build a reputable business in a touristy area by kidnapping all of your customers and selling them on the black market. Fine. I'm going to have to live outside my comfort zone today-that's why I married Dave.

The store driver picks us up and takes us to a beautiful mosque in a non-touristy part of town. Then we take a ride up the side of a mountain (in one of those ski-lift things that holds a bunch of people). At the top is a beautitul view of Istanbul and a restaurant that overlooks the city. (I wonder if he's going to push us off the mountain and leave us for dead?) We sit at an outdoor table and have tea and coffee. It's getting dark and cold, so we decide to head back. The driver picks us up and drops us off at the store. It's probably 7:00 and we started at 2:00. We must come in and enjoy a glass of wine while we talk about rugs. Are we hungry-maybe we need some snacks? Sabri introduces us to his boss (whose name I can't remember) and we drink wine and talk about rugs for the next 3 hrs. He has 3 helpers who bring out rugs of ALL varieties, beginning with an 18"x18" silk rug that costs $35,000. It takes 6 or 10 years to make (I can't remember). It's amazingly beautiful, but this man is barking up the wrong tree-we are SO far away from purchasing $35,000 rugs at this point in our lives! I try to explain this, but he's not interested (this man could sell swampwater to Floridians). He tells me that I must take off my shoes and socks and walk on the $35,000 rug. Telling this man 'no' is no longer an option-he never gets tired of the challenge of wearing you down. Fine. I walk on the rug.

Eventually, they start bringing out less expensive rugs, and Dave is having a blast. He is wheeling and dealing with the rug man. Now the rug man is telling me how beautiful and fantastic I am because he knows that Dave probably won't be buying a rug unless I'm on board. I don't really want a rug (although they are amazing) because we are on a grad-school budget. But now Dave AND the rug man are trying to sell me a carpet. "It will be a family heirloom!" Also, we are on our 2nd or 3rd bottle of wine (again, it doesn't matter if you say 'no' they fill your glass anyway) and my resolve is wearing thin. At this point I realize that we WILL be leaving with a carpet, so it might as well be one that I REALLY like.

We have purchased a rug, and assume that we are headed home, but we would be mistaken. Now we MUST join the rug man for dinner at his family's restaurant. Holy smokes. This day has not gone even REMOTELY like I thought it might when I woke up this morning. Cont.

Istanbul - Chapter 1

First we will start with the flight. It's a two hour flight from Prague to Istanbul and they serve a FULL meal, even if it's not a mealtime. There are 20 meal options to choose from (which must be done 24 hrs in advance) and they include every dietary and religious restriction you've ever imagined. Vegetarian, vegan, Jewish, Muslim, diabetes, low-sodium, dairy-free, etc. They even have a "special occasion" option for birthdays and anniversaries. The food was FANTASTIC. They served real cheesecake (not the Jello-brand mix) and real butter. The wine was complimentary. These people are maniacs! You would have to be choking in the aisles to get a soda refill in the US. The last time I flew across the US (6 hrs) I got pretzels! And to put you in a festive frame of mind, there is Turkish music playing as you are boarding the plane. I love these people already!

When we arrive, someone was supposed to pick us up, but that didn't go very well-they were two hours late. Then he drove at least 100 mph to the hotel. These people seem to view traffic laws as a suggestion. We checked in, dropped our bags and went to get dinner. We were in a touristy area, so there were lots of restaurants on the main street with guys out front yelling friendly greetings to coax you in to their restaurant. They are relentless, but very friendly. A welcome change from Prague.

The food is SUPREME. Kind of a mixture of middle eastern and mediterranean. Lots of lamb, hummus, yogurt sauce, olives, etc. Turkish coffee is good, but different-sort of like espresso. It is served in a tiny cup with sugar or black (no milk). Also, everyone drinks hot Turkish tea all the time. No activity of any kind begins before everyone enjoys a cup of tea and some conversation. It's a fine way to start any kind of gathering.

Unfriendly=Understatement Cont.

Next we went to Berlin, and I loved it, despite the weather. It was SO COLD and WINDY! Probably like Boston. It's a huge city with different types of architecture and neighborhoods. The main thing I noticed was how friendly people were, which I would not have imagined. I always thought that the Germans were a stern group, but not true. I didn't realize how much I was enjoying Germany until the train ride back to Prague. The closer we got, the less I wanted to come back. And the reason is that the Czech people have got to be the most unfriendly people on Earth. I hear the Russians are unfriendly, but I haven't met them. For the first month in Prague I was enjoying that no one makes small talk, you don't have to act friendly if your in a bad mood, and not only do you not have to hold the door, they look at you like your nuts if you do. Initially this was working out pretty well for me because I'm not big on mandatory friendliness. However, it has started to wear on me, and I realized it on the train back from Berlin. People in Prague, will NOT look at you or speak to you, and it's not just foreigners. They will push you before they will help you or hold a door. I have not met a single Czech person that I could have coffee with and I'll be shocked if that changes before we head back to the U.S. It's unfortunate because the city is SO old and beautiful. It's a good place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live here.

Unfriendly=Understatement

I'm sorry to have left you all for so long. A few things have happened that have kept me from posting any more blogs. 1. I have most things figured out, so my daily life has become really dull. The grocery store and laundromat have become unfortunately routine. 2. We have been travelling on the weekends, and it takes up more time than I realized. Three weeks ago we went to Vienna, last weekend we went to Berlin, and tomorrow we leave for Istanbul, Turkey for Spring Break. (It sure beats my last Spring Break in '94 at Myrtle Beach!) It's sounds so exotic travelling to all these countries and it's awesome, but it's like going to Virginia. All of these countries are so close. The bad thing is that you're constantly saying "please" and "thank you" in the wrong language, and you really need a fanny-pack to keep all of the currencies straight.

Vienna was not at all what I thought it was going to be. All of the buildings are huge rectangles made of white stone-they all look like the capital building, with very little variation. There weren't any eclectic neighborhoods, and the people were definitely not glamorous. Dave was impressed by how many people wore sweatpants. For some reason I had been envisioning the set from "The Sound of Music". So wrong. Our favorite thing was the cafes. They were huge rooms with high ceilings and lots of old decor. The waiters were all men that wore 3-piece suits, and they didn't care if you sat there all day. The food was fantastic. If F. Scott Fitzgerald had walked in I wouldn't have batted an eye. We also went to a show at a national theater/opera house that was amazing. It was an Alfred Hitchcock film with a live symphony playing . Fabulous.

We were glad we went to Vienna, but we probably wouldn't go back, except to stop at a cafe on our way to elsewhere. Cont.

A Day In the Life

Everyone appreciates a lazy day, especially me. It's even better if the dreary weather gives you all kinds of excuses to stay inside. Today I discovered that a day of doing nothing has to have a few ground rules. First, you have to have access to some kind of television or movies. Preferably in English. Second, it's nice to have someone to talk to (on the phone or in person), if you want. It's also nice to have the option of an activity-("I think I'll reorganize the closet!") When you TRULY have nothing to do, it gets trickier. I have read books and magazines, showered, cleaned the room and watched tv. It's 8 p.m. and everyone is staying late at the studio to finish their projects. I'm starting to become (more) eccentric with all of this time I'm spending alone. The last time this happened, I ended up with 5 cats.

So, in all of my free time, I did some channel surfing. Here is what I discovered: We have approximately 20 channels of porn. I think they are mostly 1-900 numbers, but it's hard to tell because they are all in German. However, they do show boobs on regular tv (sorry mom) and I don't think they are into plastic surgery. All natural, and that's not necessarily a good thing.

My next option is music videos. There are probably 3 channels and almost all of the videos are from the U.S., but I've watched the same videos so many times that I've memorized the dance moves. So when Britney calls looking for back-up dancers, tell her I'm in Prague.

Option #3-World News. Not terrible, but it sounds like the reporter is debating whether or not his life is worth showing up to work for one more day. At least it's in English!

And finally, the Jesus networks. There are at least 2 channels that are on 24 hrs. a day. And the best part is that all of the preachers have southern accents! I spent two hours on Daystar Networks without batting an eye. My favorite show is called "The Ramp". As in 'the ramp to Heaven' I presume. It has young fatigues-clad dancers performing a step-routine for Christ and a minister who is late 30's(?) and looks like Chris Robison, lead singer of the Black Crows-long hair, tattoos, etc.

So what are the long term effects of watching too much Ausrtian MTV and Jesus TV. Maybe I'll be able to come out with my own religious video! The possibilities are endless! I've been pondering a career change-now who wants to be a back-up dancer?

McMansion is Relative

Yesterday we moved to the penthouse. We had originally requested a two person room with a private bathroom, and when we arrived, that's what we got, technically. Our room had two single beds pushed together and about 2 feet around the edge of the bed to walk. We had some decent storage space, but you either had to stand in front of the door or sit on the bed. Now the bathroom. At first we thought there had been a misunderstanding because our bathroom was down the hall, so we assumed we were supposed to share it with other people. When Dave asked them, they said that it was, in fact, our private bathroom. Super. Two problems: it smelled TERRIBLE and we had to take keys with us every time we left the room. Imagine locking your bedroom or living room, unlocking the kitchen or bathroom, relocking, and repeating as many times as you move from room to room. This includes 3 a.m. when you have to pee and your hand-eye co-ordination isn't so great. This also rules out peeing with the door open, my personal favorite. And then there was the SMELL! It smelled strongly of sulfur all the time. I'm not sure if it's a common problem here, but some of the toilets have a permanently terrible smell-like sewage. The bathroom itself was immaculate and recently renovated, but none of that could stop whatever may have been lurking in the depths.

So our old room was probably 12'x12' with detached bath. Our new room feels like the equivalent of Robert Redfords' estate. Two people can pass each other without one of them walking on the bed. We can even pull out a chair far enough to sit on it (without the back of the chair touching the bed and blocking the door). There is enough room on the floor to have a picnic (as when entertaining friends)! The possibilities are endless! And we have an attached bathroom-no more peeing with the door closed for me-Dave is thrilled. (In case you don't know Dave, this is sarcasm, Dave is not thrilled. When he asked me why I refuse to close the door I told him that it gets too lonely in there. He didn't even argue-probably because you can't argue with a crazy person.) Also, this bathroom doesn't stink! All of my dreams have come true! Move over George Jefferson...

Smoking and Fitness

It turns out that the Czech people do not smoke in as many public places as I had imagined. I had envisioned smoking on the treadmill, in the produce section, at the elementary schools, in the hospitals, etc. Realistically, it is mostly restaurants and bars. SOMETIMES they have a non-smoking section (of 4 tables) but the second-hand smoke has so thoroughly saturated the place that it makes zero difference.

I had heard a rumor that the gyms here had a bar with cocktails and smoking for before, after, (and during?) your workouts. Well, I've only been to one gym and there was no one smoking. And as far as I could tell, there were no cocktails either (sadly). The only "bar" is a smoothie bar and I don't think that they are spiking the smoothies. Honestly, I'm a little disappointed. Not that I wanted to be wheezing on second-hand smoke during a yoga class, but the irony would have been pretty funny.

I signed up for a Pilates class at the gym. I was waiting for the instructor on a bench outside the room with a few other ladies. Two feet in front of me was a weight machine. A body-builder who was 6'15'' about 300 lbs. comes over and has to use this machine. The gym was empty, but apparently he had to use THIS machine. Not only that, but he had to grunt LOUD with each rep. It was hilarious! Maybe it was all a coincidence, but it sure felt like he was trying to impress us while he blasted his delts.

So more and more people are showing up for Pilates and I'm getting worried because its giving me a flashback of the time I signed up for water aerobics and was the youngest by at least 40 years. Then the instructor shows up. All of my previous instructors (in the U.S.) have been very thin, super-fit women who could kick Wonder Woman's ass. Not only is my instructor a DUDE, but he's huge (almost as big as the delt-blaster) and covered in tattoos! Hmm. Like everything else in Prague, not what I was expecting.

It turned out to be a really challenging class-more like a combination of Pilates and high-school p.e., but still worth the 100Crowns ($6.00).

Next I'm going to try yoga or zumba. Not speaking Czech makes these classes a whole new adventure-its really helping me learn how to count to 10.

What a Difference a Decade Makes

Today was the last day of classes for the week (no class on Fridays) so of course people are ready to unwind. The interesting thing is that our NCSU group has around 25-30 people, 75% of them female. In addition, many of them are as young as 19, and the legal drinking age of 18 is really just a suggestion. So one might imagine that the activities that the ladies have planned might not coincide with the ones that I have planned. Some of the grad students, Dave and myself were playing cards with one of the professors in the common area when we got an anonymous tip. Apparently the ladies were getting ready for a big night out that wasn't starting until midnight and didn't require much clothing. Well, I couldn't pass up an opportunity to see the train before the wreck, so I marched upstairs for some small talk. Nevermind the fact that I don't know any of their names or have spoken more than 5 words to any of them. Also, I was wearing my favorite outfit-grey sweatshirt (too big), bright green sweatpants (sagging in the butt), brown fuzzy socks and teal danskos. Also, I had a braid on one side of my head because the other side had come out. It is amazing that they didn't assume that I was a homeless person. I made enough small talk to get a good look at things (micro mini-skirts, cleavage everywhere) and then they asked me what I was doing. Maybe they thought that I just hadn't started getting ready yet. After all, it was only 10:30. I still had plenty of time. I almost choked to keep from laughing. I wished them fun times and headed back to our room. I just hope I get to see the remnants of the trainwreck tomorrow. How was it so much fun 15 years ago and now is absolutely unbearable? Signing off-it's 11:30 and almost past my bedtime.

The Learning Curve Cont.

Well, another learning curve. I just realized that I do not have an indefinite amount of space for a single blog post. That took 30 min.

Now, back at Tesco in the grocery section. First I am going to need a cart. It's important to watch and see what everyone else is doing so as to embarrass yourself a little less. It looks like you have to unlock the carts by inserting money. Got it. I'm collecting packaged items and doing my best to decipher what might be inside, but it is nerve-wracking because Tesco is like shopping in the middle of Times Square. It is a mob scene at every hour of the day.

Now it is time to collect my produce. At least I know that I have to weigh it and get the price sticker. I'm nervous, but I think I can do it. I'm watching everyone in the produce section and no one seems to be weighing anything. In fact I don't even see a scale. Crap. I CANNOT screw up again-it's really beginning to effect my self-esteem. Maybe I should just put all of the produce back and purchase 3 months of frozen pizza. No, I can do this, but I'm going to have to ask the man for help. I ask if he speaks English-"a little". It turns out at this store you don't have to get the price sticker from the produce scale. They take care of it at the checkout, just like the USA! I make it through the checkout (without incident) and pack up my groceries-one backpack full and two grocery bags. When I return my cart I get my deposit back! This trip has gone swimmingly, and it only took me just under 4 hrs.! Now I just have to get these groceries home on the metro...

I am beginning to realize that my ideas about getting a job may have been nuts. There is no way to have a job here without speaking the language, unless I want to be a mime. And as it turns out, I don't have time for a job because most errands (groceries, laundry, etc.) are taking nearly 4 hrs. I try to commit to one errand per day. Any more than that would probably give me a nervous breakdown.

I hope this all doesn't sound too negative because we really are having a great time. Things are getting easier each day-it can be frustrating when you have to do everything wrong the first time in order to figure out how to do it right, but we're getting there. It's also been great to be with a group of Americans who are embarrassing themselves right along with you. It makes me sad to be fulfilling every horrible American tourist stereotype out there, but it's a learning curve.

The Learning Curve

We have been here a little over a week and my greatest discovery has been that everything takes FOREVER! This has nothing to do with the people of Prague, but my own inability to read maps and communicate. Also, walking, taking the metro (below ground) and the tram (above ground) take alot more planning than walking out to your driveway and zipping off in your car.

Ahh-my trip to the grocery store. I just picked up a few items, one of them being grapefruit. I take my items to the checkout and the cashier asks me something in Czech holding up the grapefruit. I have no idea what she wants. I realize (eventually) that she must need the price. I walk back to the produce section (far away) and realize that I have no way to communicate the price to her, so I borrow a pen from one of the other NCSU students and write the price on my hand. Now the line at the checkout has really grown. The cashier finally comes over and gets the price herself. As it turns out, you have to weigh your produce in the produce section and the scale spits out a tag with the price that you are supposed to put on your produce bag. Whoops, I guess I missed that. I know the Czeck people are not smiley, but she was clearly pissed.

A few days later I go to the Tesco, which is like Target on steroids. It has 6 floors, the first floor being a full grocery store. My goal is to get a few items to use in our room (knife, cutting board, hairdryer, etc) plus groceries. Well, I need to plan ahead because Tesco is a combination of metro plus walking, and I have to be able to get all of my items home. The Czeck people have opted not to embrace the rolling carts that they use in New York and D.C. Looks like I'm going to need a backpack. First I go to the floor with housewares and find most of my items pretty easily. However, plastic utensils are giving me a fit. They are nowhere to be found. I spend 30-45 min. looking for them. Maybe the Czeck people don't use them. I finally decide that I'm going to have to ask (Tesco employees speak very little English-I hate asking). She tells me that they are on level 3 with paper, as in stationery. Obviously she must have misunderstood what I was looking for because I can't imagine what plastic forks and stationery have in common. Well what do you know-she understood me perfectly because there they are, right next to the greeting cards. Hmm. Wouldn't have been my first guess.

Now it's time to look for a hair dryer. Probably in the beauty section (which is one entire floor). Wrong. They have liquor in the beauty section, but not hair dryers. After riding the escalators up and down for the better part of an hour, I decide to ask. She wants to sell me hair SPRAY. Close, but not quite. Now it is time for me to begin acting out how a hairdryer works and sounds. I'm glad no one here knows me because charades is embarrassing when you are the only one playing the game. Eventually we sort it out and she tells me that they are on the fourth floor in electronics. Right next to the televisions and game systems. Of course.